There are two ways to build self worth—the old way and the new way. The old way was the one I was taught. I was taught how to improve self worth by making myself better—like I was defective and needed correction. Self worth only became an issue in my high school years. In fact I really didn’t know much about self worth but I was programmed to make something of myself. Once I made something of myself (like I was nothing) I could then feel accomplished and good about myself. Having no self worth is no fun. You feel ignored by your peers and less than.
If I had self worth others would look up to me and admire me—maybe even be a bit jealous. I’d be more popular with the girls and maybe have someone with whom to go steady. I thought having a car would be a big step towards getting a girl friend, but it only attracted an under age kid two years younger than me who made me feel like a big shot so I’d let him drive my car. I’m glad I didn’t let him drive it alone. He decided he wanted to speed and hot rod my car as I was anxiously sitting in the passenger seat. I reached over and removed the keys from the ignition and the car drifted to a stop. That ended our friendship. I don’t think you can do that with today’s cars unless you put them in park.
I did get mostly A’s and B’s during high school thinking that would make me popular, but it didn’t get me into the hip crowd and didn’t attract any girls. Looking back, I guess I compensated. I had no self worth or success socially so I stuck my head in books and got A’s and B’s. I gave up on high school and started looking beyond to making something of my self.